Category: Life Skills

Your Feet Were Made for Stinking, Not Sitting

feet_on_Chair

I’m baffled that this topic has been so discussed in my circle that I had to write an article to direct people to in the future.  I hope that this article will save you a lot of time and energy should you have to deal with these people as customers in your food establishment or as friends in your living room.

The only tricky part will have to figure out is how to deliver this post to them without offending them.  It’s the same dilemma we face when we need to let our colleague know they have something between their teeth or sewer breath. If you are like me, though, you won’t worry about offending them but will revel in the fact that you have helped them on their journey to becoming a better human.  You have not offended them, you have helped them.  You have added value to their life.

The discussion started between BitBar (Bitter Barista) and a customer.  BitBar pointed to a lady who was sitting cross-legged on one of the chairs in his cafe.  She had removed her shoes completely and was sitting on her bare feet which were in full contact with the chair.  It looked as if she was in her own living room.  Here is approximately how the dialogue went:

BitBar: Look at that.  Isn’t that disgusting?  Would you put your stinky bare feet on someone’s chair like that?

Customer: I wouldn’t do it personally but you have to let it go because that’s what girls in Vancouver do.

BitBar: Are you serious?  You think it’s ok that her stinking bare feet are on my chair?  Would you be alright with that if I did it in your living room?

Customer: Well, I wouldn’t do it but I’d probably accept it.  I mean at least she took her shoes off

BitBar: So the dirt from the road is better on my chair than the fungus-stench from between her toes?

And the dialogue went on like that.

Let me conclude the matter for you all.

Like Public Display of Affection (PDA) (ie. french kissing, fondling, etc) some people (most) don’t want to see it.  It’s simply not for public.  Keep your tongue in your mouth and your hands out of other people’s pants when you’re not in a hotel or the privacy of your own home.

Your feet are no different.  They are gross.  They are both sick and wrong.

Look how angry the disciples got when Jesus asked them to wash His feet –  And those were divine feet.  Last time I looked at my feet, I felt nauseous.  The last sock that was near my nose made me want to hurl.

So keep those beasts on the floor and locked safely in your shoes until you unleash them in your own home or at the beach.

Thanks for your cooperation.

Your friends, family and baristas sincerely appreciate it.

Tags : , , , , , , ,